We’re back online!
Hello everyone, first an explanation is in order. We suffered another catastrophic event after a [REDACTED] ran amok in our server room.
Read moreExperience the difference
Welcome to the new home of Friikin, your sherpas on the mountain of global conquest and beyond.
Explore UsAbout Us
We're Creative
Thinking outside the box is what we do here and if that doesn’t work, inside, on-side, inside out and outside in.
We're Award Winners
Our team comprises some of what were the best the fringes had to offer with many awards won between them.
We're Genius
We’re the best. Just fantastic. Other facilities, total disaters. We’re a bunch of stable geniuses.
We’re Your Outsourcing Specialist in World Domination.
Trying to take over the world is a full time job, believe us, we’ve tried. But there’s no reason our experience can’t be pivoted to best serve you, a new generation of young, eager, start-ups and your dreams of world domination.
Social Engineering
Not all mind control comes in the form of a mind control ray. Sometimes it’s the subtle little nudges that make all the difference but usually it comes in pill form.
Weapons Manufacturing
From death, freeze and shrink rays to giant magnets (although we still don’t fully understand how they work) we have the resources to meet your destructive needs - wholesale discounts availible.
Bio-manipulation
Stronger, faster, better aren’t just reserved for the artificial. We can make YOU better (results may vary).
Asset Acquisition
From new team members to test subjects, our highly skilled team can hunt down any potential candidate and deliver them mostly unharmed right to your doorstep (non-terrestrial lairs at extra cost).
Call Center Support
As a part of our commitment to providing a total support structure for your evil shenanigans, we provide 24/7 support ranging from how to deal with pesky British Agents to Mystery Teams as well as anonymous counseling services for henchmen (just kidding, we totally report all cry babies).
Dry Cleaning
An army of henchmen/loyal employees are great but all those matching uniforms also means a lot of laundry. Let us keep those uniforms clean and tidy while you focus on the more important things.
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Bzzz zzzzz bzzzzzz bzzzz bzzzzzzzzzz zzzz zzzzzzz bzzzzzzzzzz bzzz zzzz bzzzzzzzz!
Friikin helped bring my plans to fruition, binding those who opposed me with specially grown organic ropes was not only genius but also a bit knotty.
Latest Post
Teleportation: NOT that difficult
The following is a transcript of a speech given by Dr. Brun Van Swingstelston at United Nations Outreach Seminar in Uganda on 3/5/2011 regarding the future of travel in a post-nuclear age.
Read moreSuggestion box abuse
ATTN: Pharm Workers This is to address about 99% of the complaints stuffed into the suggestion box on a daily basis, specifically from the clone population working within the Mutant Pharm.
Read moreContact Us
Contact Details
While we are normally the ones who contact YOU, we understand that not everyone creates a blip on our radar. If you feel our services may be a good fit for your organization, send us an e-mail.
Secret Location
Email: contact at friikin.com
When it came time to outsource the creation of an affordable clone army, the team at Friikin was there to meat my needs ;)